| Description | Size |
|---|
| Colin 'Bomber' Harris has knocked himself out and so he is the winner and he goes on next week to meet himself in the final! | 21K |
| Brought to you tonight, ladies and gentlemen, by the makers of Scum, the world's first ever combined hair oil, foot ointment, and salad dressing. | 23K |
| I want a last supper with one Christ, twelve disciples, no kangaroos, no trampoline acts, by Thursday lunch, or you don't get paid! Bloody fascist! | 29K |
| That's not the point. There are twenty-eight disciples! Too many? Well, of course it's too many! | 16K |
| That's the problem. What is? The disciples. Are they too Jewish? | 15K |
| Oh, I know, you don't like the kangaroo? What kangaroo? No problem, I'll paint him out. I never saw a kangaroo! Uuh...he's right in the back. I'll paint him out! No sweat, I'll make him into a disciple. | 27K |
| Now, a last supper I commissioned from you, and a last supper I want! With twelve disciples and one Christ! One?! Yes one! Now will you please tell me what in God's name possessed you to paint this with three Christs in it? | 43K |
| Is this the right room for an argument? | 5K |
| If we took the bones out it wouldn't be crunchy,would it? | 8K |
| Is your wife a goer,eh, know what I mean,know what I mean,nudge,nudge, say no more. | 14K |
| Oh, wicked, wicked, you're wicked, eh? Know what I mean, know what I mean? Nudge nudge? Know what I mean! Nudge nudge, nudge nudge? Say no more!! | 23K |
| And Rene Descartes was a drunken fart, 'I drink therefore I am' | 11K |
| Sit on my face, and tell me that you love me, I'll sit on your face and tell you I love you,too | 21K |
| Have you come to arrange a holiday, or would you like a blow-job? | 10K |
| Do you get wafers with it? Of course you don't get F**king wafers with it, it's a f**king albatross | 16K |
| Shut your festering gob, you tit.Your type makes me puke you vacuous toffee-nosed malodorous pervert | 17K |
| Good evening ladies and Bruces | 5K |
| Well sir, I have got a silly walk | 8K |
| You can put in the hands of your attorney, but it'll never stand up in court | 9K |
| Albatross!!!! | 5K |
| Don't give me that you snotty-faced heap of parrot droppings!! | 10K |
| The Entire Bruces Philosophy Song | 127K |
| Hot enough to boil a monkey's bum! | 6K |
| All right! Now, the reason we do this, ladies and bruces, is frankly over here we find your American beer is a little
like making love in a canoe! Making love in a canoe? It's f*cking close to water! | 37K |
| Right, I just want to remind you of the faculty rules. Rule 1: No poofdas!! | 13K |
| Rule 2: No member of the faculty is to maltreat the Abbos in any way at all...if there's anybody watching | 17K |
| Rule 3: No poofdas!! | 6K |
| Rule 4: I don't want to catch anybody not drinking | 12K |
| Rule 5: No poofdas!! | 6K |
| Rule 6: There is NO Rule 6!! | 10K |
| Rule 7: No poofdas!! Right, that concludes the reading of the rules Bruce | 11K |
| There's a dead bishop on the landing | 6K |
| The Church Police!! | 8K |
| What fish you got that isn't jugged then? Rabbit. What, rabbit fish? Yes, it's got fins.
Is it dead? Well, it was coughing up blood last night | 29K |
| Well, that was really horrible! Oh, you're always complaining | 11K |
| I cut down trees, I wear high heels, suspenders and a bra. | 14K |
| I'm a lumberjack and I'm okay, I sleep all night and I work all day | 15K |
| The ENTIRE Lumberjack song (2 minutes and 47 seconds long) | 407K |
| What a silly bunt | 4K |
| Morning, I'm Bounder of Adventure.
Hello, I'm Smoketoomuch. Well, you better cut down a little then. | 14K |
| Oh, look, this is futile. No it isn't.
Look, I came here for a good argument. No you didn't, no, you came here for an argument! | 13K |
| Well, I mean, you're a man of the
world squire. Yes. I mean, you've been around a bit, eh? You've, uhhh, you've done it. What do you mean? Well, I mean, I mean
like, you've uh, you've slept, with a lady. Yes? What's it like? | 47K |
| It's 'Being Hit on the Head' lessons in here. What a stupid concept! | 8K |
| Rat cake, rat sorbet, rat pudding, or strawberry tart. Strawberry tart? Well, it's got some rat in it. How much? Three. Rather a lot really. | 23K |
| I always wanted to be a lumberjack!!! | 12K |
| We were evicted from *our* hole in the
ground; we had to go and live in a lake! | 13K |
| When we got home, our Dad would thrash us to sleep with his belt! Luxury. | 17K |
| 44 competitors from 29 different countries, all of
them with the most superbly weak bladders. Not a tight sphincter in sight. | 21K |
| We'll be bringing you back to this exciting contest the moment anything
interesting happens. | 14K |
| the 200 meters freestyle for non-swimmers. Watch for the top Australian champion Ron Barnett in the second lane.
[Whistle] [Splash] Well, we'll be bringing you back here the moment they start fishing the corpses out. | 42K |
| Nevertheless, I advise you to in future to replace the words 'Crunchy Frog' with the legend 'Crunchy, raw, unboned, real, dead frog' if you want to avoid prosecution. | 27K |
| After a bit all I could do was bang me gavel. | 7K |
| NASA agreed to limit the number of nuclear tests in Granny's little house to two on Thursdays and one on Saturdays after tea. | 22K |
| Well, no one leaves this show empty-handed, so we're gonna cut off his hands. | 13K |
| The Germans are disputing it! Hegel is arguing that the reality is merely an apriori adjunct of non-analytic ethics, Kant by the categoric imperative is holding that ultimologically possessed only in the imagination and
Marx is claiming it was off-side! | 30K |
| They're a typical Hollywood audience! All the kids are on drugs, and all the adults are on roller skates! | 15K |
| The wicked wolf was shot by security guards. [bang bang] | 12K |
| It's a fair cop, but society's to blame. Agreed. We'll be charging them too. | 11K |
