Children's Interview

(Scene : An interviewer bending down to speak to 3 children in playground.)

Interviewer: Eric ... do you think you could recognize a larch tree?

Eric: (after much deliberation) Don't know.

(Roars of delighted pre-recorded laughter from unseen audience.)

Interviewer: What's your name?

Michael: Michael.


Interviewer: Michael, do you think you know what a larch tree looks like?

Michael: (bursting into tears) I want to go home.

(Shrieks from unseen audience.)

Terry: Bottom!

(More shrieks.)

Interviewer: Are there any other trees that any of you think you could recognize from quite a long way away?

Terry: I ... want... to see a sketch of Eric's please...

Interviewer: What?

Terry: I want to see a sketch of Eric's. Nudge Nudge.

Interviewer: A sketch?

Terry: Eric's written...

Eric: I written a sketch.

Michael: Nudge nudge, Eric's written ...

Eric: Nudge nudge ... nudge ... nudge

Continue to the next sketch... Nudge Nudge