Gumby Theater


(Sound of Telephone being hung up)

John Cleese: ...and several butchersí aprons. The next groove on this record has been electronically engineered by some of the worldís finest craftsman to bring to your homes the full glorious spectacle of Gumby Theatre.

(Fanfare music followed by hand clapping)

Eric Idle: Gumby Theatre comes live tonight from the Yvonne Gumby Theatre near Guilford. L.D. Gumby, M.J. Gumby and R.S. Gumby star in the 'Cherry Orchard' by Anton Checkov. The action takes place near Moscow in the 1870ís.

(Sound of birds singing and then knock on door)

Michael: Come in!

(Sound of someone crashing through the door)

Michael: Oh, open the door and come in!

John: Sorry!

Michael: Hello!

Eric: Sorry!

Michael: Shut up!

John: Iíve got my head stuck in the cupboard!

Eric: Sorry!

Michael: Shut up!

John: I canít see anything!

Michael: Hello!

John: I canít see anything!

John: Hello!

Eric: Shut up, Mr Gumby!

(sound of glass breaking)

John: Ohhhh... my brain hurts!

Michael: Shut up!

John: Sorry!

Eric: Ooohhhhhh...

Eric Idle: (As an announcer) meanwhile in St Petersburg Illya Nataevska and Mariana Plaentkoff await news of their step-brother Troffemoff.

Michael: Hello!

(sound of more glass breaking)

Michael: Oh I have broken it!

John: Get off my foot!

Michael: Shut up!

John: Sorry, my brain hurts! My brain hurts!

(sound of more glass breaking and then sound of music)

Eric Idle: (As an announcer) That was 'The Cherry Orchard' by Anton Chekov adapted for radio by putting it onto a piece of wood and banging a few nails through it. Mr L.M. Gumby is now appearing in the Thames near Whopping Steps and Mr D.P Gumby is appearing as a central tunnel support on the new Victoria line. And now 'Book at Bedtime'. This weeks book is 'The House at Pooh Corner' read by Mr. N.D. Gumby.

Michael: Oh, I hit my head on the table!

John: Oh, shut up!

Michael: Sorry!

John: Oh I have a piece of brain stuck in my head... oh my head hurts!